I don’t just go to yoga for the stretching and that the relaxation. I don’t go just for the words and the smooth open feeling. I also go for the quick pinching in my muscles and the slight sheen of sweat and the effort of breathing in through your nose out through your mouth… slowlie, evenlie, of holding your whole self, just like that, for just one more breath.
Still the pulling and the aching might feel good, but the rest of it is important too. And tonight the teacher said something that kind of hit home how we often like to know why things are like this and what happened to make them like this. I’m that person. I want to know who and what and why and how. I need it, or I feel lost and terrified. And then she said…
“There’s beauty in the confusion and fear and intensity. True magic happens there.”
And I geuss I could learn to live with the fear. I geuss someday it will feel normal and okay, but for now, whatever it says about me, I’m going to keep asking why. It’s okay that you can’t give me an answer.